Do you know the feeling? You are both happy and satisfied but deep inside unpleased and frustrated … excided jet anxious … curious though nervous … Your feelings are conflicting … Not all the time - well at least not on the surface … You live in deny.
But I know. I know the outcome. I know the feeling on the other side. Deep down I feel it. I need it, I long for it. It makes me going. Surviving. The feeling of my true identity. I have been hiding so many years. Denying. I have been playing along for so many years, that I sometimes wonder whether I am capable of anything else.
But I know. Deep down.
When time is right. Not now. I’ll use the meantime to growth. And when times get too tough, I hold on to the little seed – to the little light which keeps my spirit up.
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