My promise

It’s been a long time since I’ve been blogging… Not that I haven’t had a lot of thoughts about my life and situation, and not that I haven’t had trouble gathering the thoughts, but I have been busy and all in all it’s been a hell concentrating and focusing! The big celebration is just around the corner, my beautiful son who is about to be confirmated. He is on the stairs to adulthood. It’s a very wonderful day and we all look forward to it. It has taken all my energy – and now, with only a few days left, I can see the outcome of our efforts, and my to-do-list is getting shorter J

I guess I suppress a lot of mixed emotions at the moment. –Have done for a lot of years actually, but now it’s feeling worse, or maybe I’m not that good at suppressing them any longer… Many years ago I made a pact with myself… Think time is up, and a part of me wants the pact to be fulfilled… It frightens me though, cause I know it won’t be without a lot of conflicts. I hate conflicts. I want to be in control, even though that means compromising on many personal issues… That’s going to change! –Just not right now…